You’re Gonna Miss This

I may not miss the 3 a.m. wake up calls
startling awake, convincing my aching bones to move
rocking until the weight of your sleeping body finally gives in
and I can sneak back to the warm recesses of my bed.
Milk stains the front of my nightgown,
but I’m too tired to care.
One day you’ll sleep all night
and I’ll wake rested and refreshed, thanking God for the end of this sleepless season.

But it’s okay if that’s not tonight.

Because even though Mama’s bones are tired,
I secretly love our midnight dates,
praying the sacred prayers of a mama’s heart over you while we rock.
The house is silent. Your warm head fits perfectly into the crook of my arm
and I know that the day will come too soon
when it no longer will.

So we rock because I know I’m going to miss this.

I go out for a long awaited night out with friends who I’ve missed so much.
For nine beautiful months, I took you everywhere I went
and since brining you Earthside, you’ve relied on me to meet your every need.
Being away from you for the first time feels liberating.
But then my breasts become heavy and achy
and my arms long to hold you against me.
I feel frustrated at this primal reminder that my body is your nourishment.
I long for seasons past when I did not live by a clock.

But as I scoop you into my arms and nestle you against my chest,
we both feel the relief, like coming home
and I know that the day will come too soon
when you’ll no longer need me in such a raw and consuming way.

So we nurse because I know I’m going to miss this.

I wanna help make supper! you squeal as you grab your stool.
It’s late and I’m starving and the last thing I have is patience for little fingers and rice spilled all over the floor.
You sit in the floor and chop a mushroom with a butter knife.
I stop and I watch you.
They warned me it would go so fast.
They told me not to blink.
Suddenly, you’re this incredibly witty, empathetic, curious, creative little girl
and I marvel that despite all my shortcomings and
all of the moments when I let my frustrations get the best of me,
you’re the perfect illustration of God’s love and grace.

You challenge me in unimaginable ways
always asking why
making unreasonable and illogical demands
about which cup you drink out of or what song we listen to or which book we read.
You’re never in a hurry
and you don’t care what people think as you break dance in the lobby at the bank.
Sometimes I count the minutes until bedtime.

But then you place your tiny hand inside of mine
and I remember the privilege.
The privilege of getting to make pancakes shaped like Mickey Mouse
and having dance parties in the kitchen.
The privilege of slowing down.
One day you won’t need my hand to cross the street or to tie your shoe.

So I hold on tight because I know, I’m going to miss this.

The seasons are fleeting,
childhood is but a glimpse.
Open your eyes,
Breathe them in
Memorize the shape of their body as they sleep against your chest.
Allow them to change you.
We think we have so much to teach them,
but they have so much more to teach us.
Listen.
Be present.
Don’t blink.

You’re gonna miss this.

Buying Kid’s Clothes on the Cheap: Tips and Tricks

I’m not going to lie – when we found out that Ellie was a girl, I was thrilled. This meant Barbies, hairbows, and of course, CLOTHES. Before she was even born, her closet put mine to shame. Creating a wardrobe of that measure is no cheap feat, and I quickly discovered that even though the clothes were cute and fun to buy, she grew out of them in seconds (some she never even wore) and she covered the rest in spit up and diaper blow outs. Baby clothes are fun to buy, but they are even more fun to buy when they’re cheap! As a now seasoned mom, I’ve learned that Mom to Mom consignment sales are one of the best ways to create awesome wardrobes for your children on the cheap. Here’s a few of my tips:

• Go before the sale opens. Yes, the line sometimes wraps around the building. Go stand in it. I know this sounds nuts, but all those people are going to grab all the best stuff and then make a line just as long inside to check out.
• Be prepared for an entry fee. It’s usually a dollar or two, but sometimes they offer “early bird” rates where you can pay more to get in before the crowds. Have small bills ready if possible to make getting inside a breeze.
• If you’re looking for gear or something specific, go there first. There’s 80,000 onesie pj’s, but maybe only 5 jogging strollers. If that’s what you’re looking for, head straight there.
• If you have older kids, go to their sizes first. Older kids wear stuff for longer, which means it often wears out. People also don’t have baby showers for their three year old. The selection of bigger sizes is often much less than the baby sizes meaning it gets picked over more quickly. Shop for your big kids first and then hit the baby section.
• Bring cash. Sometimes there are special lines for people who are paying with cash, so you might be able to check out quicker. If you’re using cash though, bring more than you think you’ll need or go through what you’re buying before you get to the register and add it all up. Cash can also be a great way to budget so you don’t spend more than you want.
• BYOB (Bring your own bag). This will make shopping so much easier and will free up your hands to search through racks rather than holding clothes. It also makes things easier if you’re planning to buy toys, shoes, or gear.
• Leave your children at home (if you can). If that’s not possible, DON’T bring your stroller. It might seem like the perfect solution for containing kiddos, but these sales are often tight quarters with narrow lanes and a stroller can make it difficult to get through. If you do need to bring your kiddos, wear little ones and bring snacks and toys for older ones.
• Shop fast. If you can get inside right when the sale opens, shop quickly, and then get in the check out line, you have the best probability of getting out before lunch time. If you dawdle, you can sometimes wait an hour or more to check out. If you’re only buying a handful of things, look to see if there’s a special line for people buying small quantities.
• Look for clothes your children can grow into. This is a great time to not only buy for the current season, but also for the seasons to come. Often these sales are either “summer clothes” or “winter clothes,” but there are so many staples that carry over into multiple seasons. Also, remember that because it’s used, it’s probably been washed several times, so items may have shrunk a bit.
• Check out the “other racks.” I don’t know about you, but I hate paying a ton of money for things my kids aren’t going to wear all the time – like a halloween costume or a swim suit or snow gear. Consignment sales can be great places to find things like shoes, socks, coats, swim suits, dress up clothes, and nursing gear.
• Go if you’re expecting. Even if you’re not sure the gender of your baby, these sales can be a great place to find things like nursery furniture, breast pumps, strollers, baby carriers, and so much more. They also usually have a rack or two of maternity clothes. Having a baby is not cheap, and even if you have a shower or two, these sales can help fill in the gaps or provide backups (if grandma needs a highchair or dad needs a carseat base).
• Mark your calendar for sales in advance. When you shop, the sales clerk will usually give you a flyer with dates and times for the next sale. Mark your calendar before you throw it away.

Almost all of the clothes that my children wear are either hand-me-downs or gently used items I’ve found at these consignment sales. Not only do I love a good deal, I love that I can stock my kids’ closets with cute clothes and not spend a fortune doing it. Plus, it makes it easier to swallow when the baby outgrows the super cute overalls the second time you put them on…..